Conversing

Finns place great value on words, which is reflected in the tendency to say little and avoid 'unnecessary' small talk. They are better at listening than at talking.

The conception that Finns are a reserved and taciturn lot is an ancient one and does not retain the same validity as it used to, certainly not with the younger generations. Nevertheless, it is fair to say that Finns have a special attitude to words and speech: words are taken seriously, and people are held to what they say. "Take a man by his words and a bull by its horns," says a Finnish proverb. A Finn will carefully consider what he (or she) says and expect others to do so too. He (or she) considers verbal agreements and promises binding, not only upon himself but upon the other party too, and he (or she) considers that the value of words remains essentially the same, regardless of when and where they are uttered. Visitors should remember that invitations or wishes expressed in a light conversational manner (such as: "We must have lunch together sometime") are often taken at face value, and forgetting them can cause concern. Small talk, a skill at which Finns are notoriously lacking, is considered suspect by definition, and is not especially valued.

Finns rarely enter into conversation with strangers, unless a particularly strong impulse prompts it. As foreigners often note, Finns are curiously silent in the metro, the bus or the tram. In lifts, they suffer from the same mute embarrassment as everyone else in the world. However, a visitor clutching a map will have no trouble in getting advice on a street corner or in any other public place, since the hospitality of Finns easily overrides their customary reserve.

Finns are better at listening than at talking, and interrupting another speaker is considered impolite. A Finn does not grow nervous if there are breaks in the conversation; silence is regarded as a part of communication. Finns usually speak unhurriedly, even in their mother tongue (the pace of newsreading on Finnish TV is a source of amusement for many foreigners), and although many Finns are competent in several foreign languages, they may be wary of the speed at which these languages are spoken. Nevertheless, Finns can become excited and voluble, given the right situation.

Having once got to know a stranger moderately well, Finns are quite willing to discuss any topic; generally not even religion or politics are taboo. Finland is one of the world's leaders in the reading of books and newspapers and the use of libraries, and thus the average Finn is fairly well informed on what is happening in Finland and in the world. Finland's membership of the EU has increased interest in other EU countries, and the common currency, the status of agriculture and the effects of Community legislation are viable topics of conversation wherever two or three Union citizens come together. Though Finns enjoy bitching about the niggling directives of 'Brussels bureaucrats' as much as the next man, in general they seem to approve of EU membership and recognise its benefits.

Shared hobbies are a natural topic for conversation and exchange of opinions in Finland as elsewhere, and it can be easy to strike up a lively conversation with a Finn about culture and the arts on the one hand and about sports on the other. Sports is a particularly feasible topic because in recent years Finns have enjoyed success in sports other than the traditional long-distance running and winter sports: there are now world-class Finnish footballers, racing drivers and alpine skiers, and consequently amateurs and enthusiasts in these fields too. Golf has established itself securely especially among urban Finns, even though they are obliged to abandon this pastime for the winter months. This deprivation is an eminently suitable topic for conversation on the part of a visitor who is familiar with the world of drivers and putters.

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