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KIM BALDWIN. focused only on mundane things
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focused only on mundane things. Gable proposed they do dinner and a movie one night at her house, but Erin declined, saying she hadn’t been sleeping well and was going to try to turn in early.
There was a growing distance between them, and by the end of the week Gable wondered whether Erin might be reconsidering her decision to stop seeing Tim. There was no answer when she tried to phone her Friday night.
She got her answer on Saturday, when she drove to the F re station for a day of drills with the ladders and hoses. She was looking forward to seeing Erin and getting a F rsthand look at how she was doing, but it was Tim who intercepted her as she entered the building.
“Hey, Gable. Have you talked to Erin?”
“Why? Isn’t she here?”
“Not yet. Do you know what’s going on with her? I’m kind of worried about her, frankly.”
“Worried? Why?”
“Well, she told me last weekend she didn’t want us to date anymore. I was disappointed, you know…I had a lot of fun with her and thought it might lead to something. But I told her I understood, and it was okay.”
“I know that must have been tough for you.” Gable
commiserated.
“Well, she called the chief right after that and cancelled all her training this week. Said she wasn’t feeling well. But I went by her house to check on her, and she wasn’t there.”
“This is news to me. I spoke to her on the phone a few times, and she didn’t say anything about any of this.” Gable got a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach with the realization that Erin wasn’t telling her everything.
“Is she going to be here today?” Tim asked.
“I don’t know. I presumed she would be.”
“Gable, do you know why she broke it off with me?”
“You’d have to ask her that, Tim.”
“I did. She told me she didn’t want to get my hopes up that there might be a future for us…but I think there’s something else going on.”
“What makes you say that?”
He scratched his chin thoughtfully. “I don’t know. She just was really withdrawn during our last date, from the moment I picked her up.
• 138 •
FORCE OF NATURE
Like she was somewhere else. It was really weird, because she’d been just the opposite the week before—happy, relaxed.”
“You have no clue what’s happening with her?” Gable pressed.
She wanted to know for herself.
“I tried to F nd out…That’s when she told me she thought we should just be friends. But I got the impression it wasn’t really about me. It kind of seemed like she was blowing me off just to get me to stop asking questions. I thought maybe she told you what was bothering her.”
Gable shook her head. “I don’t think I can help. I don’t know any more than you do, but I’ll try to talk to her when she gets here. If she gets here.”
v
Erin did, in fact, show up for the training, but she arrived just as they were getting things going, and there was no time for pleasantries with anyone. She waved hello at Gable, and Tim too, but kept to herself, standing off to one side, as the chief explained the drills they would do that day.
After the brieF ng, they split up into teams of three to rotate among the ladders and hoses. Gable started toward Erin at that point, but Erin quickly positioned herself with Carl and Don, as if deliberately avoiding her. They all suited up in their turnout gear and adjourned to the training grounds situated behind the F re station—a four-acre plot that contained several concrete block buildings and a small obstacle course.
Gable had a hard time keeping her mind on what she was doing the rest of the morning, her frustration growing each time she would catch Erin’s eye, only to have her look away.
I’m not imagining it. She’s avoiding me.
By the time they broke for lunch, she had convinced herself Erin was having a delayed and very homophobic reaction to the revelation that Gable was a lesbian. It made her heartsick. And quite unexpectedly, it also made her angry. She had worked up quite a head of steam by the time she cornered Erin in the women’s locker room.
“What’s up?” Gable asked.
“What do you mean?” Erin was stripping off her shiny new turnout jacket. She had on a T-shirt under the heavy F re coat, and it was drenched in sweat from the rigorous morning. It clung to her, outlining
• 139 •
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